Through the years, I have taught my children that not everyone is going to like them – for whatever reason – and the reasons can be ridiculous sometimes. It is OK to not be liked by everyone. People who need to be liked by everyone tend to make poor decisions. However if it leads a person to closely examine oneself and improve their character and qualities, then it can be beneficial.
Learning to love yourself for who you are, despite the areas where you know you need to change, will prove to be invaluable. Without conceit, can you look in the mirror and appreciate who you are?
“Being an adoptive parent, brings struggles one would not expect. Through the years, I have learned that I am not understood by many people. My peers do not relate to me, nor I to them, but I have learned that being different is OK…..Due to our firmness in parenting, our friends have inadvertently undermined our parenting, thinking they are ‘helping’, which has caused insurmountable repercussion in the decisions of our adoptive children. Regardless of our children’s life decisions, however, we did our best….They may never realize the sacrifices we made for them, but they know we understood and loved them.” Taken from my portion of the book, Empowering Women to Succeed: Turning Tragedy into Triumph, Collaboration by Pat Gillum.
When someone who is fake or toxic for me to be around decides to leave my life, I view it as a ‘gift’ – the gift of goodbye! For example, I have learned through the years that I do not mix well with people who do not mean what they say. I take people at their word and I am left to feel like the idiot. I now recognize it quicker and move on from that relationship. We need people to value us. We need people in our lives that will build us up, not keep us down. We need people who will tell us the truth, rather than tell us what they think we want to hear. We need to seek people out who make us better people. I am continuously making friends, only to learn that they did not like me as much as I liked them but that’s OK.
Is there a lost relationship that has been especially difficult to see as a ‘gift of goodbye’? What is the main reason you cannot let go? Pride, anger, embarrassment, insecurity, or simply a strong love for them? We cannot make someone love us. God Himself, gave us free will to love Him or to leave Him. The most powerful tool we have to change hearts, whether it’s ours that changes or theirs, is Prayer. We might be surprised at what we learn from our prayers.
Have you prayed today?