Easter is my favorite holiday. I love the meaning of Easter, what it represents, the chocolate, the Easter Egg hunts we attend as well as the Easter Egg hunts we have as a family, Easter sunrise service, free breakfast after the church service and the delicious family dinner.
Through the years, holidays have lost their excitement and meaning. Thankfully, I’ve learned some tips that have brought back that excitement.
Things I’ve learned after adopting traumatized children:
Lock up candy when not choosing something to eat from their basket. I’m not saying deprive them of eating their candy, but I found that one child would often steal everyone else’s and leave other children in your family feeling sad and angry. So for everyone’s well-being, lock up candy.
Replace candy and chocolates with a small gift, such as a kite, Lego set, or a book. Holidays have been materialized and candyized (and yes, that is now a word 😊). None of us, especially those sensitive to dyes and sugars, need a ton of candy for every holiday that comes along. Some candy/chocolate is fun, but beyond that, it’s simply not healthy.
Number gifts and hide them, rather than using labeled baskets. Wrap the gifts and keep a tally of how many were hidden around the house and what rooms were used to hide items. Announce how many gifts each person can find. At the end, when everything has been found, hand out the gifts to the proper recipients. This way, the seeker does not give away a hidden gift that does not have their name on it. None of the gifts have a name. I use numbers so that they don’t know who’s whose until I hand them out. Also, I have hidden things like uno cards and Pop tarts as family gifts, making the hidden items a larger number than just one each.
Keep things simple. Keep everything simple. Preparations for holidays can be more exhausting than the actual holiday. Find ways to keep preparations simpler. For example, I’ve learned to buy a dinner side at the grocery store. Don’t be afraid to have something on the table that wasn’t prepared by your hands. I have also made the menu much smaller. If everyone doesn’t get their favorite dessert, sometimes I’ll make their dessert a different day soon after Easter, but for Easter, I’ll only make a simpler assortment of desserts. A store-bought shrimp platter can offer a fun treat that you didn’t have to make. Decorations are fun but keep them at a minimum. Often, I found that I was the only one doing the work and it felt lonely and exhausting. My kids couldn’t help me. Their trauma gets in the way, whether they are remembering traumatic events from past holidays or feeling like you hate them or remembering their biological parents as if they are Saints, they may attempt to make your Easter preparations difficult. Put on music that set the mood for you and do not expect help. Expectations can surely disappoint.
These are just a few ways that I have made Easter not just more tolerable, but more fun for me, as well as those around me. When mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy. Take care of yourself and learn to set limits. Enjoy your holidays and create new traditions for your family. They will look forward to these traditions even as they grow older. They also look forward to these traditions you set, when they are struggling with their traumas.
